Friday, July 15, 2016

The Attitude and Latitude of Forgiveness -Dr TN Chugh

The Attitude and Latitude of Forgiveness -Dr TN Chugh

15 July, 2016
Pictures and Videos: Amar Singh Jyani, GS Mann
The Attitude and Latitude of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is voluntary and intentional feeling to give up resentment from someone who has done something wrong. We should adopt a merciful tendency, without agitation, so that the victim realizes the fault. It has been observed that the victims also undergo a positive change in feelings and attitude regarding offense. Many persons get annoyed and angry at petty mistakes of others while great persons possess humility of forgiveness. Let us go out of negative emotions and do not expect compensation to forgive others for their faults. The Lord also commands us to repent on sins and seek His reverence in the form of forgiveness.

The words related to forgiveness are pardon, exculpate, exonerate, remission, condone, excuse, liberate etc. The person who work against this nobility, adopt abhor, despise, execrate, loathe, avenge, penalization and retaliation.

Passion to Adopt Forgiveness: 
•         Forgiveness is not an instinct and choice but it is a skill which a person can develop through learning and understanding. Many persons acquire this noble quality through the supreme guidelines of religious ascetics, noble teachers and virtuous elderly persons.
•         The capacity of forgiveness has to be decided whether a person is trying to forgive one or others or seek remission for others. The status of crime also cannot be ignored.
•         The excellence of forgiveness can be obtained through introspection, sanctity and meditation. It is the divine blessing which wishes us to perform righteous actions. The quality of pardon is a strong spiritual attribute.
•         Presume glorious achievement when you forgive someone reflecting personal moral benefits.
•         Confer effective apology on understanding limits of offence quite different from your heart-felt kindness.
•         Develop sympathy to discard the feelings of anger and revenge to encourage the concept of humanity.
•         Forgiveness may consume time and energy because certain decisions are not instant. It may be in the form of condoning, excusing, pardoning, forgetting or reconciliation.
•         Do not indulge malpractices, harsh or quarrelsome actions which may turn to be sinful deed. It is not good to have friendship with people of evil and negative thinking.
•         Meditation helps us to live, love and progress with peace. Let us work at our regular meditation with commitment, patience and humility without expecting or demanding anything in return. Prayers and meditation can purify our mind, provide soul power tonic and elevate sublimity.

 Benefits of Forgiveness:

1.       Forgiveness is a kind and compassionate feeling to lead a blissful life. Forgiveness given or taken can be helpful in providing reconciliation and peace. Goodness in man is like fragrance in flowers.
2.       Strengthen relationship with friends and neighbors because certain events may be misappropriate, insulting or even quarrelsome. Such situations may cause disappointments and hurt our feelings of trust and commitments. Forgiveness at personal level or through certain mediator can resolve the misunderstanding and then motivate for better relations. Teachers should also acquire the quality of forgiveness to inspire their students.
3.       Improvement of family concerns: Sometimes, the incidents of true or false blaming appear among parents and children, brothers and sisters, husband and wife, family members of in-laws etc. All the members should adopt the feelings of co-operation, trustworthiness, commitment and sacrifice for harmony. Forgiveness stops the downward perception and improves our relations much before decline and termination.
4.       Promote tolerance and humility: The attitude of pardon is internal humane quality which will provide enduring peace of mind. However, the grudge creates tension for the victim and the sufferer. Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness, humiliation or dishonor.
5.       Create peace at national level: The passion of forgiveness with eminent politicians, administrators and statesmen can avoid enmity among co-workers and followers.
6.       Positive feeling is healthy and productive to reduce sufferings. The concept of ego,  ill-will, hatred, exploitation and superstition weakens your consciousness.
The Intensity of Crimes:

The extent and quality of offences are different which are forwarded to the court of laws for seeking justice. Certain misdoings are being mentioned here with enhancing trends:
•         Anger, complaint, disrespect, punishment through parents or teachers, quarrels due to difference in opinions among family members, do not feel sorry for mistake, creating tensions among neighbors or society, do not follow norms of traffic, delayed payments of debts, arrogance of pride etc.
•         Small accidents, beating, theft, non-payment of debt, corruption, termination from job without reason etc.
•         Large scale attack with attempt to murder, action of dacoit, property seizure, acid attack, violent assault on govt. official, incidents of rape etc.
Sometimes, the culprit remains un-identified; therefore, the instant forgiveness is difficult.

Eminent Agencies promoting Forgiveness:

Elderly and socially important persons or elected representatives of villages etc.try to resolve many issues through collective and timely meetings with culprit and the harmed individuals Their family members are also requested to approach for peaceful solution. Certain state governments have also appointed magistrates to decide the cases through settlements even   amongst the persons already involved in judicial courts. The criminals subjected to jails are also provided some relief on recommendations from police, when the prisoner adopts good behavior. The president of the country also has the right to review the judicial punishment to provide certain relief to the culprit. The person subjected for capital punishment may be provided long term imprisonment.

  Many important quotes promote forgiveness:
Ashta Vakra---Forgiveness is supreme peace. Take forgiveness as innocence, compassion, contentment and truth as nectar.
Mother Teresa---There are a few ways we can practice humanity: To speak as little as possible on oneself; To accept contradictions and corrections carefully; To pass-over mistakes of others; To accept insults and injuries; To accept being slighted, forgotten or disliked; To be kind and gentle even under provocations; Never stand on one’s dignity; To choose always the hardest.
C. S. Lewis---“I think that God forgives us, we must forgive ourselves, otherwise, it is almost setting up ourselves as higher tribunals than Him.
Joel Osteen---Keep in mind, hurting people hurt other people as a result of their pain. If somebody is rude and inconsiderate, you can almost be certain that they have some unresolved issues inside. They have some major problems, anger, resentment or heart-ache, they are trying to cope with or overcome. The last thing they need is for you to make matters worse by responding angrily.
Martin Luther King---Forgiveness is not occasional art, it is constant attitude.
Alexander Pope---To err is human and to forgive Divine.   

Divine aspects of Forgiveness:

The prominent philosophers belonging to various religions consider that our misdoings and wrong actions against any person, society or nation as sins. The disobedience of moral laws (divine command) creates tensions, anguish, pain and suffering in our mind that we have acted against the divine power. We should repent on our sins to seek His forgiveness. We can acquire relief, comfort and even pleasure if we focus our attention. We should adopt virtuous principles of humility and humanity. We should provide moral and financial help to the needy. The concept of forgiveness changes bitterness to love. Actually there is not much difference between human and divine forgiveness, therefore, one should forgive with sincere mind and willing spirit. Be merciful because God is merciful. Give the world, the best you have anyway. Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a supreme attribution through strong personalities. Hindu priests treat forgiveness as ‘khshma’. This noble quality can be granted through spiritual kindness, tenderness and compassion. This achievement can be promoted through purity of thoughts, tolerance, courage and meditation

Contributed by: Dr. Triloki Nath Chugh.
Co-Ordinator, Shah Satnam Ji Educational Institutions,
Dera Sacha Sauda, Sirsa (Haryana, India ).
The writer is an eminent former Professor of Zoology; he has more than 3 decades of teaching experience in various colleges of KUK and is presently Co-ordinator, Shah Satnam Ji Educational Institutions, DSS, Sirsa. He can be reached on his Mobile No:+91-94160 48789 and email: . Dr Chugh has published many Zoology research papers; Guided several M.Phil students for research; M.Sc. Secured 2nd Position BITS PILANI 1968; Gold Medalist in French Diploma 1981 KUK; Prinicipal at SSS Boys College for 7 years.

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